Don’t ask me

Attention pretty much everyone that comes to me for technical advise or assistance.

Stop asking me. Please.

Actually, you can continue to ask me. But, before you do, please read the following aloud to yourself before you proceed.

  1. Am I going to question the advice that db gives me?
  2. Am I not even going to consider the advice that db gives me?
  3. Am I only asking to make him feel like a smart tech guy?
  4. Am I going to question the procedures he recommends?

If you can answer yes to any or all of these questions, then you are no longer allowed to ask for my help, assistance or guidance.

Remember, you came to me. STOP WASTING MY FUCKING TIME!

That is all.

Published by Don

Lead bottle washer at, host at and tech guru for the MotoringFile family of sites.

Join the Conversation


  1. Agreed. No, I can’t get your DOS-based golf scoring program to work. No I can’t hook up your USB printer to what looks like a SCSI-port mated to a racoon’s asshole. And no, I can’t fix your broken monitor that probably blew a fuse or a tube or a drum resistor or god knows what else.

  2. As some one who has often asked for your advice, let me post some answers for you-

    1)Possibly. Not because I don’t believe what you’re telling me, but because if I understand what you’re telling me I probably won’t ask you again.

    2)I always consider the advice db has given me.

    3)No. Enough people stroke db’s ego, it doesn’t need my help! πŸ˜€

    4)Only if I have no idea what db’s talking about because he’s not using the same geekspeak dialect that I speak…

  3. oh man, I totally forgot the disclaimer as this was in no way shape or form directed at any w(t)f reader.

  4. No worries, I didn’t think it was directed at me. I’ve heard some of your work stories and figured that’s what triggered this πŸ˜‰

    But let me add one of my own:
    If you break one of my expensive printers because you’re incapable of properly loading paper – Is it really necessary for you to hover over me while I undo what you did? My brain is much more effective when you’re not standing 2 inches away from me!!!

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