teh The Oscars

Posted in Observations — by Don on 03/07/06

Of course I watched.

Some observations…

Did anyone else notice how much they were pimping seeing a movie at the threatre? This is where I mention if there was anything worthy of the big screen and way kick ass sound, then sure. Or if it didn’t cost half a weeks groceries to go. Or if there were 20 minutes of commercials AFTER I paid that high dollar amount. Or the crying children, or the cell phones ringing, or the sticky floors or blah blah blah. I’m good watching at home, until you give me a reason to otherwise.

I like how Jon Stewart stood in front of the crowd and called them a bunch of liberals. That was pretty awesome. Or how he told the salespeople (see above) that they need more original films. That was pretty awesome too. But the best part was when he started firing ‘I Love Oscar’ shirts into the crowd with the t-shirt gun.

Then there was Ben Stiller. Or at least I think it was him. I couldn’t really tell, since he was invisible and all. Seriously, that was the most ridiculous f’ing thing I have ever seen, even from him. I laughed not at all and was actually slightly embarrassed.

I didn’t know Chris Rock and Billy Crystal had a thing. Interesting. I thought they made a cute couple.

I was amazed at how many movies were nominated that I hadn’t heard of until that night. I guess I need to watch more tee-vee.

I will not see Broke Back Mountain. While I’m sure it’s a great film, watching robots ride horses just isn’t my cup of tea.

Boobs. I don’t think there were enough boobs shown this year. Granted I did miss the red carpet preceedings, but boobs are what make the Oscars, in my opionion.

If they actually bashed the award winners over the head with a viola to end their speech, that is show I think I might actually think about paying for.

I’ve actually been to the Kodak Theater. On it’s opening night no less. Of course, I was working, but I still got to check it out. I can tell you that it isn’t as nice as the nicest movie threatre in your town, and not much bigger either. And you know they close off the street for a week before the event, right? That’s because parking is non-existant. Don’t believe the safety bullshit they keep saying. They need a week to clear cars off the street so all of those limo’s have someplace to park.

Seriously tho, I could have easily missed it. But, if I did, I wouldn’t be able to say the following:

That was 3 1/2 hours of my life that I will NEVER get back.

Ugh.

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(4) comments
  • http://www.jwiltshire.org jSchwa

    I didn’t watch. I think I didn’t miss anything.

  • http://guapacha.com Paul

    Yeah, not many boobs partly because one of the ‘biggest stars’, the lovely Keira Knightley doesn’t have any. I would still gladly have her children and do her laundry any time though.

    Highlight for me was John Stewart’s mock pitch for the Church of Scientology, I bet he isn’t getting a xmas card from Travolta or Cruise this year.

  • TDot

    Jon Stewart: [See films in the theatre...support actors] Some of these women can barely afford enough gown to cover their breasts.

    There…not only have I shown my affection for Mr. Jon Stewart here…I’ve also smacked Don for wishing on a “star” for more bare breasts.

    Not too shabby EH? ;)

  • db

    Totally unfair if you ask me

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